Thursday, May 20, 2010

National Parody Writers File Suit

[Guest Post By blogger disaffected]

May 20, 2010 (FAUX News) - The National Parody Writers Association filed suit today in Washington D.C. district court claiming an unspecified amount of damages against both the Democratic and Republican Parties as well as yet to be specified members of the main stream media (MSM) and their "associated sycophants in the blogosphere."

Industry spokesman Fred Snodgrass said that the suit had been under consideration since "at least the beginning of the Bush XVIII administration," but that "recent events on the part of both parties, as well as the willing complicity of the MSM and the members of the blogosphere," had pushed member parody writers to the "end of their ropes."

"There was a time when parody writing was a fine and honorable profession, and in a normal society where some sense of truthfulness and decorum ruled the day, parody served a useful purpose as a comedic interlude and pointed commentary on those who would deem to take themselves too seriously.

With the advent of the Bush XLIII administration in 2000, parody writers the world over began to feel their livelihoods threatened, as it became increasingly difficult to distinguish parody from genuine, normal, day to day news events, especially here in the U.S.

Unfortunately, the election of Barack Obama has only intensified this trend, as both major parties have apparently enlisted the full time help of the MSM and large swaths of both the conservative and liberal blogosphere in declaring all parody, all of the time. We believe it is time for this ugly trend to stop and for parody writers to return to their rightful place as the purveyors of the nation's parody."

Conservative commentator Newt Gingrich immediately denounced both the suit and the Parody Writers Association as "a symptom of the vast secular, liberal, atheist, communist, socialist, fascist, Stalinist, Hitlerist, gay, drug-taking, sex-having, baby-killing, minority-loving, god-hating, granny-killing, U.S.-hating, defeatist, conspiracy [pausing for deep breath] that threatens freedom loving Americans' rights everywhere to go to their local WalMart dressed only in the made in China shower shoes and bath robe of their choice to buy cheap, unnecessary, plastic shit from fat, sweaty, junk food addicted, drug-smuggling, too many baby having, illegal Mexicans who no habla the ingles."

National Tea party representative Harvey Windbagger replied, "The Tea Party is the new parody. We represent nothing less than the parody of an actual political movement based on another political movement, which is in itself a parody! We are the parody of a parody that the Parody Writers Association would like to parody if they were only up to the task. When I first set eyes on George W. Bush back in 1999 – whose entire life was a parody by the way – my parodic political course was set for life. But when Sarah Palin came along in 2008, breathing new life into the term farcical and teaming up with John McCain, who is also one of the great parodies of the late 20th century in his own right - I knew political parody would be the dominant force in world affairs for the entire 21st century and that I was destined to be a part of it."

Obama Press Secretary Robert Gibbs dismissed the suit as "a well meaning but short-sighted attempt at publicity from a group that stands to eventually benefit from the Obama administration's continued efforts at global military conquest, the ongoing quest for cheap oil, environmental degradation, unlimited debt, and corporate welfare, designed to appeal most especially to our growing constituency on the Republican corporate bankster right, and who we will continue to shower with benefits and gifts as long as they keep lining our pockets, not only while we hold public office, but especially after we transition to the even more lucrative private sector."

Court officials are expected to conduct a parody of a legal review of the issues in the case, before dismissing it out of hand and announcing it to an openly skeptical press and disbelieving public on a farce of a news broadcast.


  1. More good parody in the news today. Seems Floyd Landis, 2006 Tour de France Champion, who was subsequently disqualified for using performance enhancing drugs and who has fought the charges against him vehemently ever since, now has decided to come clean in an email to the TdF race organizers and cycling governing bodies, admitting that, yes, he had indeed been guilty of the drug charges all along, and, yes, his denials ever since had all been lies, because, well, you know, because.

    He went on further to accuse Lance Armstrong - seven time TdF winner and former Landis team mate, who has also been accused widely by numerous other reliable sources of doping - of doing the same, apparently based on the theory Armstrong, who is once again racing in the TdF, shouldn't be allowed to get away with the same shit that the rest of his team has already been busted for.

    Which is true, on the face of it. But where in the world do you even begin to sort out this whole sordid mess, with cheaters who lied about cheating and later admitted lieing about not cheating now accusing accused cheaters of cheating and lieing? Truly a parody of a parody of an actual legitimate sporting event if there ever was one.

  2. disaffected,

    Those who do trials in the courts call this a "liars contest" ... the trick is to come up with the "best" liar (best jury deceiver) ... if you want to prevail in the game of lifelessness they call life.

    Anyway, nice post on parody!